it’s like this… I’m in the bank line.. you know the drill… I’ve got a deposit to make… I choose the line next to the window, because I can’t find a pen, so need to share one with the teller (you know the old pen & teller bit)… besides, there are only two cars in front of me… couple of lines beside me with only one car… and I’ll be quicker in this line, because the pen won’t have to travel through a tube… well… I sit… and I sit… the line beside me has only one car in it… I get out of my line… you know what happens… I get in the line with the one car… unbeknownst to me, he is handling all of the deposits for Christmas shopping for a big weekend at the mall (apparently)… I wait… the line I have just left… it clear two cars pull up and zip through while I am still waiting… during all of my waiting I play with Max… who is babbling to himself in his car seat in the back… I sip my coffee…. I dig through my purse.. wow I do have a pen in here… ugh!!!… finally I am next… I place my checks in the tube… and I wait some more.. I am staring at my teller as if that will speed up this process… finally she greets me saying something nice and Christmasy like good morning … hope your holidays are going well… I’ll be with you in a second… by now I am wondering what the rush is … why am I so impatient…. the sermon from Sunday is wafting my way…. Advent…. waiting…. preparing… being patient…. making room for the Christ child in my life.. in my heart… ugh!!! she sends me my deposit slip and says Happy Holidays…. I drive off thinking of Sunday…. why are we–am I–so impatient…. for me … it’s difficult to just slow down sometimes and enjoy the moment…. enjoy this season… to realize the importance of Advent…is maybe to realize the importance of waiting… preparing our hearts… preparing our lives…. for the coming of the Christ child…
… I am reflecting back on my life today… waiting to begin my music career… starting it in Dallas… all I learned about myself and life… during college times and teaching school after college…. if I had gone straight into music after high school…. I would not be where I am …. I know the waiting to make that step … for me was the right one… waiting to get married… we dated for 6 years…. no need to rush in to things …right!!… for us, it was the right decision… during those years we learned so much about ourselves… our relationship… and how to truly love and accept each other….the move to Nashville… waiting for the right time…. the right reasons… the support of friends and family… the churches in Plano and Franklin believing in us and encouraging us made a huge difference… waiting to have children… having Max this year has been a life changer…. it has been wonderful.. and I am so glad I was in tune with God’s time… and I didn’t miss this oppurtunity… Ron and I working together now … traveling with Max… my life is rich in ways I cannot begin to express or explain… and some of it has been the choices I have made.. and others have been the choices I have waited on and been patient to listen to God’s lead….. finally we just bought a house… a home of our own… for years we have looked…it never was right .. always obstacles… always pushing and trying to make something work… then this fall … seems like it all fell into place…. I’m sure you can look back on your life.. and recall similar stories….
so what does God have to teach me about myself … my life this advent season… like my past … maybe I need to trust that God is doing something new…. in my life… if I’d just get out of the way… and not try to rush God.. If I’d just slow down a little and be still… I’d hear God whisper… Celia … I’m coming for your this year… I’m coming to be born in your heart… I’m coming to heal your hurts… I’m coming to bring reconcilation in your relationship… I’m coming to be your Savior… I’m coming to love you and teach you to love… that’s worth waiting for… right….
Merry Christmas… may your lines be short this year…your eyes still filled with a child’s wonder…. and may you learn in the waiting moments… God (like the good parent I want to be..) could use this time as a teachable moment… if we’d only be open to it….
celia